TIA moments

So much has happened since I last wrote - 

(August) - My first group arrived and although it wasn't perfect (too many TIA *This Is Africa* moments) I met some amazing people, had a few great sightings, got kind of lost in Moremi, got to see a lot of ellies in Khwai, ate too much bread, still hate town day, got amazing earrings from one of the volunteers – they’re ellies and I love them!, had a great night of drinking too much wine, oh and Mankwe’s dining hall, bar and lounge burnt down so all the guests were moved to Tuskers. Worst 9 days of my life. Started off with very unhappy, rude guests and staff testing me at every turn.  I was running around like a headless chicken trying to get everything ready before the guests arrived. Imagine me all red in the face. It’s not pretty…anyways fast forward 9 days and the manager from Mankwe finally arrives so that he can take over and I can finally concentrate on my projects! Met Christiaan to talk about well, EVERYTHING since we hadn’t spoken since the first day. Then I got to spend 2 days in Maun – not that exciting, but I did manage to quickly catch up with a friend before having to head back to camp.

Oh just have to mention that one lady from the unhappy, rude group told me she was “born in Africa you know” so I asked her, so? As if that was supposed to mean something. She even recorded the tour leader arguing with me about everything.

2.       Fast forward to September – where my second group arrived, all older than 45 but most of them lovely. Except of course an extremely arrogant American couple who is basically here for a cheap safari. Unfortunately for them there aren’t that many animals here so research it is! Have had to tell them so many times that they’re here for research. The woman keeps asking me when we’re moving back to Tuskers – EVERY SINGLE DAY, so today I told her, how about she doesn’t ask me anymore and I tell her when we’re moving. Much easier! She doesn’t have the guts to tell me off, instead she does that to the others. Silly old lady.

3.       So we have this guide – now he must be super special to get a whole point by himself – our GM found him somewhere, warned me that he doesn’t have a lot of experience so we’ll have to see how it goes. Not only does he have a wonky eye, but I’m sure he’s not all there most of the time. His English isn’t very good so I don’t think he understands me most of the time either. Here are a just a few of his antics – he arrives late to pick up my first group, only to help chief remove the puncture wheel of another vehicle while I’m sitting in the car basically yelling at him to get in the car; he keeps driving in the middle of the road which is badly corrugated even after I tell to drive on the side of the road; he almost races past elephants so that we have to shout at him to stop – then he tells us how great elephant meat tastes and that you wouldn’t want to eat anything else!; he drives the cruiser while the temperature gauge shows red, I only hear it boiling once we’ve stopped, ask him is he going to do something about he, he just looks at me, so I jump out to pour water over the engine, had to tell him rather sternly that you don’t drive it in the red, you’ll blow the engine; he drives like mad man while we’re sitting at the back bouncing around dodging branches while getting wacked in the face, almost hits an owl on the way – I confront him about it and he keeps saying “give me an excuse” instead of chance, even after I tell him he means chance right.

4.       Things haven’t really improved with our guide – he has given us enough laughs though so won’t complain about that. He drove us to Xobega, and on the drive through Moremi, he said the most random things, some of which was totally incorrect a) we see a herd of female kudu with one young male = a group of brothers according to him; b) we see zebra, shout at him to stop and he announces, “here we have zebra”; that the impala leave their glands which are in their hooves on the ground they walk on (he actually means scent from their glands)
5.       Sitting in my room with a flat phone = no alarm for the morning and I need to wake up at 6:30! Hope my natural alarm wakes me up :x I was standing outside, double layered with my beanie ready to walk back to the car to fetch my cord when I started either hearing or imagining noises. Think it’s the latter. Now I’m in bed wondering if I shouldn’t just man-up and go fetch it. Haven’t heard anything scurrying around. Yet. What a pansy. Actually we have hyena walk through camp. Not sure I’m ready to face one up close just yet. Or maybe I just won’t shine my torch around so that I don’t know what’s around me. Can’t get scared if one doesn’t see the hyena staring at you;) 

Ok I’m going. If I never right another update – you know why! Seriously need my other alarm clock from home. Might just have to remember to buy a cheapie at Pep. Remembering being the imperative word. Sigh.

#wildatheart




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